Processing Complicated Grief With an EMDR Intensive Retreat
Grief is a testament to the depth and meaning of the connection. However, it can become overwhelming and traumatic. With the help of an EMDR Intensive Retreat, you can begin managing your grief.
Typical Symptoms of Grief
Obsessive thoughts and intense longing
Nightmares
Inability to accept the passing
Hear their voice
Life feels meaningless or empty
Survivor’s guilt
Often, the person experiencing traumatic grief feels alone and doesn’t want to burden others with their feelings of depression, anxiety, and loss.
To survive the overwhelm, numbing and avoidance become necessary.
What Impacts Grief?
Early life experiences impact grief and mourning. If an insecure attachment style was developed during childhood and adolescence, losing an attachment figure in adulthood can be significant and preoccupying. It can contribute to the grief becoming what is called complicated or prolonged grief, meaning it can last for months or years. Integrating the loss can feel impossible.
If the grieving becomes complicated, looping occurs: the loss activates the desire for attachment, but the attachment figure is gone. The attachment styles are activated and cause further distress of emotions, thoughts, memories, longings, and then avoidance and then more attachment seeking. Being able to let go of the attachment and the assumptions that were made with the attachment figure (e.g., we will grow old together) is a necessary part of mourning. This can occur with pets, children, parents, significant others, etc.
EMDR offers a robust and dynamic approach to grief by processing the blocks and complications.
Loosening the attachment and creating new meaning
Releasing painful thoughts and images surrounding the circumstances
Accepting the death
Processing through intense emotions and feelings of loss
Integrating the loss into the future
Processing grief is not about forgetting the loved one or positive memories. It is also not about speeding up or ending grief and mourning. It allows the negative images and intense emotions to fade while preserving love and adapting to life without the loved one. It is being open to modifying and transforming your day-to-day life with meaning and purpose.
How an EMDR Intensive Retreat Can Help the Mourning Process
Telling your story
The story we tell matters. We can connect to those we loved and lost by organizing and telling our story. As you narrate memories and glimpses of your life together, we can reframe, anchor to powerful moments, and find meaning and a sense of belonging. This is empowering and enables you to establish meaning in the future.
Exploring your attachment style and its impact on your loss
Secure Attachment Style
Securely attached individuals tend to have positive views of themselves and their relationships. They are comfortable with both intimacy and independence, having a balance between the two. Securely attached individuals are better equipped to cope with loss. They are more likely to seek support from others and express their emotions openly, which helps them process their grief effectively.
Anxious Attachment Style
Anxious attachment style may cause a mourner to experience intense bereavement for a prolonged period of time. They may experience difficulty letting go of the attachment to the one they lost. People with this attachment style often fear rejection and abandonment. They may be overly dependent on their support relationships but still struggle to manage their overwhelming emotions.
Avoidant Attachment Style
Avoidant attachment style may cause a mourner to avoid grief. On the outside, it appears that they are doing well; however, the pain is being downplayed and numbed. They struggle internally and isolate themselves.
Individuals with this attachment style tend to avoid emotional intimacy and may prioritize independence over relationships. They often suppress their feelings and dismiss the importance of close relationships.
Disorganized Attachment Style
People with disorganized attachment often desire close relationships but are simultaneously afraid of getting hurt. These individuals may experience intense emotional turmoil during loss. They might want to seek comfort from others but also fear rejection, leading to conflicting emotions and difficulty in processing their grief. They will probably self-isolate. This attachment style combines aspects of anxious and avoidant styles.
We are wired for connection, and the way we connect affects the way we cope with disconnection and loss.
Process intense emotions, memories, and thought processes
Traumatic experiences and memories are stored in the body and cause distress. They can be challenging to process efficiently and effectively. EMDR facilitates the processing and integration of these memories, making them less emotionally charged. EMDR can also help to process disturbing images, intense emotions, and thought processes such as guilt, regret, or blame.
What do you want to keep? Tapping in positive memories and feelings
After processing things that you wish to decrease or get rid of, we can then instill things you want to keep or want more of. This includes positive memories, feelings, the outlook for the future, and adaptive thought processes.
Finding meaning and integrating loss What do you want your future to look like? How to preserve the memories and their legacy?
We will explore meaning-making, your vision of a rewarding future, and how you can integrate loss and grief into your tomorrows. How do you recover and renew your future self after loss? How can you continue the legacy of your loved one?
The Goal of an EMDR Intensive Retreat
EMDR Intensive Retreat lets you get away for the weekend and focus on your recovery and healing. You’re able to retreat from your routine and accelerate your healing goals. You can find comfort and meaning in your loss.
EMDR Intensives are offered in Fairhope, AL. Find out more here and schedule your consultation. Sending you comfort and peace in the days ahead.
Ready to Process Your Grief With an EMDR Intensive Retreat in Alabama?
Embark on a transformational journey towards healing during your personal EMDR intensive retreat. Explore a safe haven designed to guide you through grief and foster resilience and inner peace. Take this pivotal step towards reclaiming your life and finding solace amidst your grief – you deserve this empowering path to healing. Follow these three simple steps to get started:
Contact me to set up a 15-minute phone consultation to see if an EMDR Intensive Retreat is right for you.
Get to know me, Julia W. Stone, EMDR therapist.
Start processing your grief in healthy ways!
Other Services Offered at Julia W Stone
It’s impossible to go through life without hitting some bumps in the road. To help with this, I offer a variety of services at my counseling clinic in Fairhope, Alabama. In addition to helping you process your grief with an EMDR Intensive Retreat, I offer anxiety counseling or therapy for chronic stress if you find yourself feeling stuck or uninspired. Additionally, I offer Single Session therapy. For those struggling with trauma, my services include EMDR therapy, trauma and PTSD, and trauma from childhood. If you would like to explore other resources, check out my blog to learn more.